ok, so it looks like sundays might be a regular miss for me. it is just hard to find time to be with the computer when everyone is home. i am going to try not to worry about it. not like the world is on the edge of their seats waiting to hear from me daily.
the weather was really nice here this weekend, and we took advantage of it by taking the boys to the park both days. we had a visit from one of our fave san antonians, and his mom. we had yummy steak and baked potatoes at the grandfolks last night, and now, it is monday morning again.
as a stay at home mom, i kind of thought my dread of the monday might be over. but sadly, no….the squirm has decided (and i am guessing of course) that he either hates school, or he hates leaving the house to go to school.
so first he doesn’t want to get out of bed, then he doesn’t want to get dressed (imagine getting a rabid bobcat into jeans and a tshirt), then any move towards the car is met with despair.he saves the sad puppy dog noises for when we actually pull up.
at the beginning, the squirm wanted to go, i could take him out of his car seat and he would walk himself to the classroom door. now i have to figure out the best way to carry 65+ lbs of babies to the door, because if you put the squirm down, he throws himself on the ground and screams.
the bottom line is 1. i get myself worked up and anxious over the process, and 2. it breaks my heart to see the squirm miserable. but, the clock ticks, and i have to face my fears. wish us luck!
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Good luck – I wonder if preparing him the night before might help – my youngest was like this for a bit around the same age – what helped me (being that she is very particular about knowing what is happening and when) was to get her clothes/shoes/bag/lunch all ready the night before – we had an established routine so that when Monday came – there was no surprise – it has really worked wonders and now at the ripe age of almost 11 she still does the same stuff – lays it all out herself – just a suggestion! Hope it gets better – much love!
i think that is a great suggestion. i have been trying to talk school up the night before, but maybe we need to establish a physical ritual. i am never sure if milo actually understands what i am saying to him. he doesn’t act like he does…
The organising and talking about the week ahead at Sunday dinner works well for me too.
If you think Milo is not catching on with words, you could use photos. Take photos of him with his school bag, the car, school, the teachers, some friends at school, etc, and put them in a sequence for him or ask him to sequence them.
Kids with autism sometimes find it hard to understand the volume of words we say. It’s too overwhelming and gets jumbled for them. For example, instead of saying ” you need to go and wash your hands for dinner now” you could say “wash hands… dinner” and maybe show a photo of him washing his hands and the dining table.
Getting eye contact can be good too depending on how the child feels about it. Some people say that kids with autism don’t like eye contact. When I was working with kids with severe autism, I found that they loved it but some needed to be desensitised to it.
Hugs
thanks again for the awesome suggestions. i am going to take my camera when i go pick him up today and start taking some pictures of his morning to school adventure! did you post something about a program for making visual calendars and stuff?
I wrote a post about communicating expectations, in which I wrote about using pictures from a programme called Boardmaker.
When I was working with kids with autism, we used a folder in which we placed the routine we were working on with the child at that moment. You can have Boardmaker pictures or photos for any routine you would like to communicate with the child about. You or the child places the pictures or photos in sequence into the folder. You stick them into the folder with those velcro sticky dots, so each photo has a velcro dot (hook) and the folder has velcro sticky dots (the fuzzy bit). The folder needs to be big enough to hold the photos or pictures, but small enough that you can carry it out into the community with you
When you are taking photos make sure that there is not a lot of background stuff that the child can get confused with, you need the child to be able to look at the picture and immediately be able to understand what it means.
some links
http://www.grandin.com/inc/visual.thinking.html
http://www.autismspectrum.org.au/index.php?mn=2-1-1-3&option=com_content&view=article&id=148&Itemid=149&Itemid=149
I found this site, but I haven’t had time to see if it’s useful – http://www.angelfire.com/pa5/as/asteachersites.html. I googled “using pictures or photos to communicate with a child with autism”.
I have heard people talking about using Makaton which I think is a combination of pictures and sign language. I never used Makaton because I knew Auslan and used that. There is also PECS but again I haven’t used it.
A speech pathologist should be able to assist you with a communication system that will suit Milo. Ask if they are skilled in communication systems with children with autism. Or if you have an autism support group you can call they may be able to recommend a speech pathologist.
I can see how this would upset you. Taking photos of his morning to school routine and then showing them to him would be a great idea – he would look on it as an adventure and something to look forward to every day (hopefully). I think having something visual is the way to go with him. All the best.
I remember school mornings such as this. You’ve been given some very helpful and positive ideas by the other commenters, so I’ll just tell you that I’m sending out positive thoughts to you & your son. 🙂